I frequently get asked to talk to people who have recently lost a loved one. Whether it be a fellow widower, daughter, girlfriend, friend, niece, nephew, uncle, aunt, etc...I get asked how do you do it? How long does it take to get better? I hate seeing my friend this way, she's not the same, will you talk to them (first off, you suck! You're being a terrible friend, no they will never be the same, and thats ok, love them for the new person they are becoming, chances are they will become a better, stronger, more amazing person). Will I ever be ok? And so much more, these are just to name a few.
It's such a compliment to be asked to talk to these hurting people, but I hate it at the same time, get it!? No? Ya, me either. To all those friends and family members of these people who have come to me for guidance, thank you, from me and from those loved ones (they may not say it, or may have a funny way of showing it, but deep down it means more to them then you will ever know, that you cared enough to go out of your way to ask for guidance) so thank you. You are good peeps.
I get asked how are you? What are you doing these days? Are you dating anyone yet? Isn't it time you move on? Mike would want you to be happy, you know? Etc....
It's been nearly two and a half years since my sweet, crazy, goofy, life loving of a man has passed on. My life has been a roller coaster ever since, I have changed for the better and I really love the person I have become from it.
Do I miss Mike......everyday, every second
Do I still love Mike.....with every fiber of my being
Have I moved on....i can't say I have "moved on" what does that even mean!? To be honest I don't know, but I do know one thing. I am happy. And to me that's all that matters.
Am I dating anyone.....no, and if I was, to be honest it's nobody's business but my own.
Where am I at these days.....I am a wondering gypsy doing what I need to do to make a happier, better me.
To all those sweet people who have unfortunately lost someone, first my heart and whole big loving heart goes out to you. Secondly, you will smile, you will love, you will laugh, you will be happy again. You just have to get there, so take a deep breath put on your big girl/boy britches and grab life by the horns.
To all those who want to curl up and die, I know where you are, and I know where you can go. Don't give up, don't lose faith or hope. The world will keep spinning and moving on (as much as you and I would sometimes like it to stop) tomorrow will come, people will move on, you will gain friends and lose friends. Time will only tell when you will be happy again, but I PROMISE you will be happy again. Going through this I have learned that each death is different and every single soul deals with death differently. And it's great it makes us, us.
One day I will tell ya'll how I dealt with the loss of my Meeskle but for now I'm done with this rambling post and will leave you with a picture of the handsome devil.
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